Plot Points #43 💌
Tradwife hypocrisy, iconic dresses, and how to walk out of a room
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Hi there! Happy Friday/Eastertide/April/Spring to you all! It has been a month…
True to its name, Lent came with its fair share of loss. We had to let go of our expectations about the buying and selling process, as our closing date came and went twice with nothing to show for it except frustration and disappointment. (More on that another time.) People we love were faced with scary news and major life upheaval. And I grieved the end of a twenty-five-year friendship; a mutual laying to rest for both our flourishing, but no less painful for it.
And, yet, those days before Easter gave us hope for what comes next. I found myself asking where, and how, God was making us all more free. Isn’t that why He moves us through what hurts, instead of around it? Sometimes we don’t even realize we’re stuck until the Lord clears a way, although it’s hard not to wish He’d go further and just transport us to the other side. But that’s not how freedom works. Freedom comes through movement, through active submission to the Father, even when we want to dig our heels in or pretend everything is fine the way it is thankyouverymuch. The truth of Easter can be so hard to face, but, oh, what freedom it brings!
I’ve missed writing these emails each week and I’m thrilled to be back. Thanks for sharing some of your time with me today!
Have a wonderful weekend, friends.
Point #1: “The best way to tell a lie is to tell some of the truth.”
is a new favorite follow of mine, and her most recent essay on the hypocrisy of trad-wife influencers is absolute FIRE: “The call to marriage and motherhood is a beautiful one. Nothing has been so transformative and fulfilling to me as my experience of family life…But does that mean that I am not allowed to have other pursuits and to prayerfully discern how God is calling my family to structure our lives? No, it does not…If the tradwife aesthetic feels like a bad fit, that’s because it’s not for everyone. It never was. And anybody trying to convince you otherwise is selling something.
Point #2: Make it make sense.
I used to be a die-hard Republican. The word “Democrat” gave me the ick and I voted down the party line in both the 2004 and 2008 elections. Then we moved to Atlanta, joined a diverse church, and started to listening to people who looked and lived nothing like us. By the time Trump happened, I no longer even recognized the GOP of my younger years and this essay from explains why continued female support for Trump remains so damn BEFUDDLING. Women, and Americans, deserve so much better.
Point #3: Diane von Furstenberg can take all my money.
The Greatest Dress of All Time is now available at Target, and I can finally stop hoping to one day find an original at the thrift store. Pierce, if you need a Mother’s Day gift idea…
Point #4: How do you walk into a room…or out of it?
People everywhere have been talking about Emily P. Freeman’s latest book How to Walk Into a Room, and it sounds like the exact right thing for those of us who are experiencing big transitions and aren’t sure how to navigate them well. Emily’s work has been invaluable to me as a writer and a person, and I can’t wait to get my hands on this!
Word of the Week
Psithurism: (n.) The sound of rustling wind or leaves through trees.
Receipts from a No-Buy Year 🧾
Saying no to myself when everything is sunshine and rainbows is difficult enough. Saying no to myself when it feels like Sad Girl Spring is an every greater challenge. But we persevere!
Clothing: $16.25
I had one afternoon where the house stuff was really getting to me, so I just said to hell with it and went to Goodwill for an afternoon. Even so, I tried to remain intentional about what I bought and ended up with a pretty floral wrap top for summer and a pair of super-comfortable chunky heels. I only have one pair of nude stilettos and one pair of black pumps, so these are the perfect middle ground for when I want to dress up but still feel my toes at the end of the day.
Books: $0.00
We’ve returned all our library books in anticipation of the move (??), so now I’m going to tackle what’s left of the actual books in my actual office.
Coffee: $17.48
Giving up sugar for Lent made not buying coffee outside my stated guidelines a bit easier, but I definitely gave in to both a few days near the end.
Total: $33.73
It’s become clear at this point how much my mood affects whether or not I want to buy something for myself. I’ve begun writing songs again and learning guitar, and this hands-on creative practice has really helped when I start to crave a dopamine hit. Who knows? I might have a whole album of songs written by the time this darn house sells…I kid, I kid. (Or do I? 😩)
Reading in The Nook 📚
I tried reading Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies: And Other Rituals to Fix Your Life, from Someone Who's Been There by Tara Schuster, but it just wasn’t my cup of tea. I’m sure I would have enjoyed it during my early twenties when the whole world, and my future in it, felt so strange and unknowable, but I’m approaching middle-age now and Schuster’s tips—while earnest, funny, and smart—were nothing new to me. I got about a third of the way through and DNF’ed it.
In fiction, I’m finally finished with Maas’ behemoth House of Flame and Shadow and it was such a satisfying end to Bryce and Hunt’s story! The connection with ACOTAR characters was the best part, so now I’m all geared up for another book in that incredible series. *checks Goodreads impatiently*
Tell me what you’re reading right now! 👇
“I don’t know what it is like to not have deep emotions. Even when I feel nothing, I feel it completely.”
—Sylvia Plath—
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Welcome back Wendi! Love that sylvia quote :)